“Comparison makes you feel superior or inferior. Neither serves a useful purpose.” – Jane Travis
‘Why can’t I be like her?” “Why can’t I be skinny like she is?” These questions do sound familiar to many of us. At point in our life, we have all played the comparison game. What a game! It brings self-doubt, low self-esteem, strips away your confidence, leaves your jealous and filled with hate, makes you ungrateful. So much negativity attached to playing this game and yet quite a number of us still take part.
I felt this topic was an important one to address and if you have read my Start Here section, you will see that on my blog, I will be addressing some of the stigmas that hold young people back from living out their purpose and becoming the best version of themselves. Comparison is a big one! Being a blogger, it’s so easy to get caught up in it because it is a competitive space, so many people no doubt who write better, are better graphic designers, have a wider network etc. and you’re more liable to fall prey to all this, well I certainly have sometimes. One thing I remind myself of each time that negative thought comes is “Rome was not built in a day.” Stop comparing your beginnings to someone else’s middle. We all have different paths, some much easier than others but what unites us is that we all have a common goal- to help mankind, to inspire, to motivate and to empower.
One thing I’ve learnt in life is “Don’t envy no one” If you follow me on Twitter, you’ll see I sent out a few tweets regarding this. Social media and the Internet today have left a bunch of ‘fake’ people putting on facades each day of their life. With platforms like Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, you see the glamorous part of people’s lives and you sit there and look down on yourself. The truth is ‘no one has it easy,’ even the very wealthy, they sometimes have even more problems. Money doesn’t buy happiness, It is good, it gives power, provides a comfortable life but it doesn’t bring peace. There’s more to life than that and it’s important to take note that even as we hustle throughout life primarily to earn an income, we should not forget the little things in life and how we have so much to be grateful for. When you start being thankful for what you have, then you have no time to play this comparison game. It’s a ritual we all should adopt- gratitude, get a journal and write down five things you’re thankful for each day, or have a vision board, put pictures of your family or loved ones, anything to keep you in good spirits.
Young people, be you, do you for you. Simple but sometimes hard to act out. Be content, someone is dying to have what you’re taking for granted. If you want the accoutrements of success, no way around it but working hard. That’s another way to avoid playing the comparison game, you see something nice that you like, it could be clothes, cars, traveling etc., be willing to work hard for it, surround yourself with people who are living the life you want and it all boils down to belief in yourself- believing you can achieve anything you put your mind to. Learn to love ‘you’ even with all your flaws, when you fall, brush yourself, get up and be willing to try again. You are a Queen. You are a King. If we all viewed ourselves as these, the world would be a better place. We are all heroes, with different stories, different experiences and do not be ashamed of your story. Embrace it; someone out there needs to hear it at some point in time. Your story may be all someone needs to take that next step in life.
Trust your struggles. Greatness is borne out of pain many a times, those experiences are all for a purpose. So do you, be you…for you!